The Great Experiment, Week Six: When Bad Friends Keep Calling

Maybe what this relationship needs is some time apart

By Aaron Koos

Relationship experts will tell you that there are basically two types of friends. Hanging out with the good kind of friend leaves you energized and fulfilled. But the bad kind of friend just sucks the life right out of you. The 2006 Orioles definitely fall into the latter category.

You know the type. Bad news all the time, constantly asking you to help them move. After a while, with friends like the O’s, you sort of hope they just stop calling until they get their act together.

Thankfully, that is exactly what is going to happen with the Orioles this week. They’re three time zones away, and the entire O’s-Mariners series won’t even be televised. Of course, you could tune in to the WBAL radio broadcast, which begins at 10:05 p.m. ET. You could also call your buddy who just got dumped and ask him to recount his break-up until 1 a.m.

My guess is that you’re going to do what most casual fans will do: take the week off. But don’t feel bad about it. With coverage like this, clearly this is not a team or a sport that cares about keeping fans.

Though don’t write them off entirely – not yet at least. Maybe you just need a break, and so do the Orioles. A little distance this week might be good for everyone.

After all, they’re only 6.5 games back, and four games under .500. These are hardly insurmountable odds, especially given that their opponents this week, the Mariners (20-25) and Angels (17-27), are also struggling. The Orioles are starting the four-game series in Seattle with their two best pitchers, Bedard and Benson, with the first start of the season by the club’s top prospect, Hayden Penn, sandwiched in-between. Brian Roberts could be back from the DL. This could get interesting.

Isn’t that always the way with bad friends, though? There’s always the hope that they’ll turn things around and everything will get back to the way it used to be. Remember the good times you shared?

Taking a week off as an O’s fan certainly isn’t going to help my CAP average, the system that rates my fan activities in the categories of Current knowledge, Ardor, and Participation. But, it can’t get much worse, either. Last week after taking the advice of my fellow blogger Matthew Taylor not to buy into the over-hyped rivalry between the O’s and Nats, I didn’t see even one interleague game. Maybe I misinterpreted Mr. Taylor’s blog posting, but nevertheless, my average fell. I’m now only hitting .172 as a fan.

Tune in next week to see what happens to a CAP average after a week where five of seven games start after 10 p.m., three straight games aren’t even on TV, the Baltimore weather forecast is mostly sunny with temperatures in the seventies, and both “Lost” and “American Idol” wind up their seasons. Watching a replay of poor Barbaro at Preakness might be less ghastly.


About mptaylor11

Roar from 34, a Baltimore Orioles Blog. Humor. History. Homerism. Since 2006.
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2 Responses to The Great Experiment, Week Six: When Bad Friends Keep Calling

  1. dayzd toe says:

    How do you figure a CAP average? I would love to see what mine is.

  2. Thanks for reading. To figure a CAP average, first you need a liquid nitrogen cooled mainframe. Then you need to call Stephen Hawking. Short of that, you can probably just estimate your CAP average based on a rough hunch…(uh, not that that is necessarily what is being done here). But rest assured, if you are reading Orioles blogs, you’re batting .400 or better.

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